Tag Archives: little girl

Silly Lily

 

“But I want that! I want that! That!” Repeating the last word a few more times, Lily’s high-pitched voice resonated in the room. Her swelling eyes met mine. I looked away.

“Pick something else,” the man behind the counter suggested.

“No!” she protested. “No, no, no!”

They are such troublesome beings aren’t they? Kids. They want what they want, when they want it. They understand very little of things.  They are hard headed, and naïve, and immature. If you’re lucky, you’ll find one like Lily.

“Give me now! Now!” she demanded.

Then she quickly ran straight for the glass shelves. To quick in fact that I didn’t catch her. Not that my reflexes are slow… Or are they?

Lily’s brown, eager eyes gaze upon every item on display. Dolls, she called them – elaborately adorned in gowns of different shades. Stamped with a smile of wax, they glared at the child – not moving, not blinking.

I watched her touch the thin glass, feeling each rack as she moved from one to the other.  How wonderful.

“Someone bought it already, dear” the man confirmed.

“Liar!”

Then it happened. That one thing I dread to see. It started with a few sobs. Which immediately turned into an imperative wailing. Then came the loud screaming and feet thumping.

“It was everything…I- I wanted.” she confessed to the air as tears rolled down her cheek.

Why are they like that? Children believe they have the best yet they’ve only seen a few. Then they cry expecting some magic tears will instantly solve everything.  Did I mention how selfish they are too? I found no fondness on that, really.

But I couldn’t help it. I was curious. I inched closer to her, I hunched. Involuntarily, my wrinkled hands reached for her shoulder, softly placing her head to my chest. This forward shift gave me a view of her eyes – broken and discouraged.

“Well now,” I paused. “How about I give you something better?”

“No, you can’t,”she said hastily.

“Try me.”

“Can you gimme something prettier and more sweet lookin’ with golden shoes and fancy clothes and braided hair and pink lip glotts?” all in one breath.

“On my mind exactly.”

And then she smiled and wrapped her small fingers around me. What a messy scene that was – her hugging me, me hugging her back.

Annoying. Charming. I didn’t understand how you could be both.

 

TEDDY

I saw Teddy again today, but only from a distance. I knew it was him. I knew it was my favourite stuffed animal that little girl in the park was holding so dearly in her arms. Teddy used to be my best friend. He was once mine but now I can’t even be near him, least embrace him once more.

I remember  it vividly – that night I lost Teddy.

Daddy came home one night with a bag full of presents. Inside were pretty dresses, drawing kits, even a video camera, a set of dolls and more teddy bears! I was so happy to the point that Daddy had to talk me back to sleep.

Days passed and I was happily amused by all the new toys I got; I was hand painting, drawing on walls and recording everything with my video camera.

One morning, I noticed Teddy was gone. I couldn’t find him anywhere. I was pre-occupied playing with all my toys and forgot where I put him last. I continued looking for a couple of hours, but when I saw how many toys I already had, I forgot all about him instantly!

Teddy left me. Maybe he found a new playmate and doesn‘t want to play with me anymore,“ I blurted out.

Oh well, why would I need him when I have all these toys in my room wanting my attention!”

I went back to the play room, had fun all day and never thought of Teddy again. Days passed and my teddy bear didn’t cross my mind. Years went by and I soon forgot about him. I grew up and kept my childish toys away.

One day, I was sitting at my usual spot on the hill in the park when my eyes wandered to a bench on my right, just near the big old oak tree. It was him. Teddy. I knew it was him the moment I saw those expressive brown button eyes and his stitched-red smile. My body was trembling as I felt like a little girl again, wanting to run towards my teddy bear, grab him and take him back home.

I was about to take my first step, when I saw a little girl running towards Teddy. She kissed him and hugged him so tightly like it’s the most precious treasure one can have. That moment I saw Teddy’s eyes glimmer as he turned toward me and smiled.

Then it struck me. Teddy has changed a lot; he has been through a lot of repairs. He used to be so fluffy and clean and white; not dirty and badly groomed. My eyes surveyed his body and I saw stitches that were never there before. There were stitches on his ear, on his tummy and on his leg and arms; Oh his right arm! It was slightly shorter than the other! It was obviously ripped and stitched back.

I was disheartened. “Oh dear friend, how can I not notice that you’ve been through so much?” That brought me to tears. I couldn’t do it. I could not claim what’s not mine anymore.

From that day on, I’ve been watching this little girl play with my Teddy in the park for hours. Day by day I sit on my special spot on top of the hill as I observe Teddy with his new playmate.

There were times when I wanted to reach out and play with him too. Countless times I wanted to talk to that little girl and tell her my story. But every time I see Teddy in her arms, I realized how long I’ve been away and out from my Teddy’s life. He is somebody’s toy now. And he doesn’t need me anymore.

How this little girl found him, I would never know. Where Teddy has been and what he has been through all these years will forever be a mystery to a stranger like me. Yes, a stranger. Because that’s what I am to him now. Nothing more.